ONE TABLET OF A VIAGRA

                                                   ONE TABLET OF A VIAGRA

John was going on with his normal work. He is a Kenya medical training college trained Nurse. He had just completed his studies at Kitui medical college. As a norm in Kenya, once one is through with his college studies and post internship period, He/she or she is guaranteed of a little bit of tarmacking here and there for a while.

 

It will also be long if you come from an ordinary family in Kenya. You will have to wait for a long time before you get a job somewhere. Not unless you come from the “who knows who” families that have an easy time and a readily available pie. The siblings from these families have their jobs in waiting in various government and some companies as they leave the college gate. Not necessarily that there is a vacancy, it is always created for them.

 

John was from a midway family, not the family that knows who but a family that can know someone who knows who in the system. (I hear of late that the way things are for now, even the system itself is complaining that it is being fought. The system is fighting itself. But who knows? Even Jesus of Nazareth said that a kingdom that fights itself is a divided kingdom. It has also been said that when thieves are planning to steal, they plan calmly and in peace. The problem arises after they have executed their plan. Trouble knocks at the door during the sharing period. That is when people will know who stole from the place of theft. Maybe that is why the system is fighting itself.) Maybe the kingdom of the system is on a free fall. And if it is on a free falling motion, one of these fine days it may experience a thunderous fall.

 

It is at this point when John was employed as a nurse in Mr. Jeff’s clinic. I am not sure if it was a clinic or a dispensary. But the owner, Mr. Jeff, a 59 year old man, was a nurse who served in the several old days public dispensaries.

 

It is here where John and Mike came to know each other. Mike was a bodaboda rider guy. On his daily search for a living for his family, (he had a wife, a son and a second born on the manufacturing line) that John became his client. Whenever he wanted to rush to his fiancées home or whenever he wanted her run away from her father’s home without being detected, he used to call Mike. Mike would just ride towards her home at the speed of lightening. Yes! Her home was about 8 kilometers from the town, where John worked.

 

From this customer relationship, John and Mike came to be friends that would share any kind of secret. Secrets that family members will never be aware off till the end of times. John was not Mike’s only customer. You see with the era of bodabodas, one need to have a mobile phone, even if it is a kabambe, such that the clients will reach him easily.

Mike had another permanent client. Doreen! Doreen was a college graduate from a leading university in the city of Nairobi. She had pursued a catering and accommodation programme. She had not yet secured a well-paying job. You see as a lady, in this world of today, when you join a university and find out that majority of your colleagues are well connected or that they come from the connected families. They tease you that they have a secured job in waiting. This makes many run mad!

 

Not unless you are pursuing a teacher training programme is when you will tell yourself that schools are many. After all I wanna join any school and teach there. If you are pursuing any of these other programmes, people will make you crack your head. Others, will tense at the final year of study. It is from this point that majority of them end up being in the wrong hands. Many men, a big number of them. Pretend that they can help you to secure a job as long as you are ready to serve them with your hot honey pot.

 

Whoever serves them with her pot whether hot, cool or cold, ends up servicing all these hyenas in many parts of the city, town, or provinces in the search of that elusive job. You will always see them move round as they swing the office chairs in the offices. They will give a look that will give you an illusion of a ready job the moment you serve them. Little do you know that what they are interested in is your honey combs! If not careful, they will squeeze all the honey and leave empty combs that can only provide wax for other uses and not a pleasurable family life.

 

The world of today is different from the old days, when the old men used to be booked from the colleges before they sit for their final exams. They used to secure jobs from different companies while at the college schooling. To them, it was a right and a norm. They even had a chance of getting some cash in form of commuting fare from these companies while at school. Those were the old days.

 

But, to Doreen, it was a different case. She had fallen in love with Peter. Peter was a son of a primary school teacher. His father was a retiree who operated a bookshop in the town. After retirement, he opened a bookshop which was really making a kill. Peter had pursued bachelor’s degree in Entomology at the university. Now Peter and Doreen were lovers, Doreen knew very well that despite the fact that they didn’t have any job, their father, Peter’s father and mother would really take care of them. After all they didn’t have any other kid apart from Peter who relied on them.

 

Peter looked for any job that was available, even if it is riding a bodaboda and earn some living. Or selling some plastic bottles where he looked for street urchins who would collect as many of them in the town and bring him. These were used plastic bottles.

It was during these processes that Peter, through his local Member of County Assembly was able to secure a job at the federal government offices. His father persuaded his friend to convince another friend of him who was close and a chief campaigner of the local MCA. With this job and the salary (amounting to forty thousand shillings per month) he decided to look for his wife (Doreen) a job that would earn her a good amount of money. He opened a big boutique through his savings, some help from his father, and some bank loan that he secured with his new pay slip.

 

He convinced his parents to assist him raise some finances to start/open a boutique for his wife, Doreen. “You see dad, Doreen should not be here as a housewife, since I have secured a job. I intend to get some cash from my savings, from the three months that I have already worked in the office but not yet paid as my payment processes were not complete.”  He told his parents as they were taking supper.

 

“You see Dad, I had fifty thousand shillings that I had saved from my hustling when I was selling those used old plastic bottles. That is one hundred and seventy thousand shillings if I had my unpaid three months’ pay”!

“That good my son! It is a good idea. You can do it for your wife Doreen.” His father said.

“Thank you Dad!” He continued. “I need you to assist me Dad! If you can help us with such an amount we can appreciate. Remember you always told me that whatever a son has his dad can double it for him”! He reminded his father what he used to tell him when he was growing up.

 

His father shook his head. But together with his wife, they agreed and they managed to get some one hundred and twenty thousand shillings. Together with his bank loan of four hundred thousand shillings, his savings and the help from the parents, he had now a cash of seven hundred and fifty thousand shillings. Enough to buy a good stock for the business. They visited several wholesale shops in Nairobi and they managed to buy their first stock.

 

The business was doing well and within four months of operation, Doreen requested to have a helper in the business. She could not do it alone. Customers flocked in her shop as if she was using some juju from Ukambani parts of Kenya or from Enugu state of Nigeria. Peter was still working in the federal government offices that were far away from the town where they had a business. But he used to commute from home. Their family background was not badly off. His father had purchased a piece of land that was few hundreds of meters from the town and located along the highway. So for him, commuting in the morning and in the evening was not a big deal.

 

She hired around two young men to help her in the shop. It was at this point when she became a permanent client to Mike. The bodaboda guy! Whenever she wanted to rush home to breastfeed her baby, Mike would take her home, don’t mind about the distance that was less than a kilometer from her shop to her home. But Mike used to give them services when Peter was hustling in the old used plastic bottle business. So they knew each other very well and calling him for such a short distance was not a big issue. After all he knew that he will be paid well. A fat pay that those long distance clients would not pay him even a quarter of what Doreen would pay him yet the distance was ten times lesser!

 

It is from these services of to and fro, that Doreen developed some intimate attachments to Mike. She was now not idle and broke as she was used to when Peter was a broke fellow. She was now having some coins of her own. Profits were high enough. Even Peter would not know how much she had because she would sometimes sell at some higher prices and at lower than the prices that they expected.

 

It is from this situation that she loved the bikes vibration. Whenever he would take her anywhere she requested to, Mike would ride the bike at some speed such that the whole bike was in a full vibration mode! It was their norm to do that as bodaboda riders. This action stimulated several ladies including school going girls. Whenever there was a midterm break. The bodabodas were the main mean of transport to ferry the students from their schools to their homes.

 

From these careless and intended actions, that was their norm whenever they were riding these females. They made sure that the bike reverberated in all of its parts. The vibrations accompanying these rides ended up stimulating and arousing these ladies sexually to an extent of demanding a quick reprieve. Call it quickie!

 

Doreen was not spared either! Whenever Mike took her that was the experience. But she was a married woman. She was someone’s wife someone’s mother, someone’s daughter and someone’s daughter in-law. To add on this, almost everyone knew her in the town. She was known as a daughter in-law to Mwalimu in the town. Peter’s father was a renowned bookshop keeper and a retired teacher. She could not therefore imagine her having a quickie with Mike. Mike was a friend to Peter too! He was their main mean of transport when they used to be broke.

 

He (Mike) was not bothered with what was going on in her thoughts. But from the look of things, he would tell that she was yawning for his pekejeeng services whenever he gave her a ride.

 

One day, there was a public vehicles service strike. She needed to rush to the next town, a distance of twenty five kilometers from her town of her residence and operations. No one else would have taken her there except Mike. He took her there! She told herself that this was her day! Mike also seduced and subdued her. She accepted to have one round of his pekejeeng taste and feeling.

 

She was not broke nowadays. She had some profits from her boutique. She had left two attendants there. So there was nothing to worry about. The business was taken care off. Her pockets were full with profits made from her new venture! Her husband was working in a different town. Here she is in a far town from where her father in-law was known by almost everybody. Why should she not have a taste of this rough masculine guy? The guy who rides the machine that vibrates on the road? Whether tarmac or murram or rough roads that never showed any signs of being a road! She wanted to see if he can cause her honey pot to vibrate like the Chinese beast. The bike!

 

To mike, he wanted to have a taste of this new catch, a business lady. A class lady who was in a working class and her husband was a working class also in a federal government office. Due to her physique, he was still afraid that he may not last more than one minute and 59 seconds. Kemboi run for one hour and 59 minutes. He was sure that he could only achieve one minute.

 

He remembered that as they operate bodabodas, they listen to some reggae music. Even though they hear nothing being said and sung in these reggae music. They only enjoy the beats anyway! But for Mike, he had an opportunity to hear one song one day. He had visited his friend John. John was also playing some reggae music and it was in his room where he had an opportunity to listen keenly and hear some words. Words that John later on interpreted and said them directly from his mouth!

 

The song was full of these words. “I don wanna a three minute man! I need an hour man! Not a weak weak man”! John had sung the whole song for him. But he couldn’t remember the whole thing. Those were just the words that he could remember. Now he is here, he is sure that he can’t even reach those three minutes since it was his first day with a university graduate and a working class woman. She was also blessed with what all other bodaboda guys used to refer as a round ass and voluminous. His lust could not even let him survive for one minute. But again, he cannot show that fear! He is a man! A man is supposed to be courageous. A man is a lion!

 

She looked for a lounge and got one. She could not have let him look for it. He would have looked for a lounge of his class! She was a high-class lady.

She secured a lounge at three star hotel. At long last Mike was there! He was now facing a mountain to climb. A mountain that he always dreamt of! A stolen mountain! Don’t you know that anything stolen is sweet? Even if it was bitter, would it not change its’ taste once stolen?!

 

He prayed that he lasts longer than three minute man from the reggae song! Boom! He started climbing the mountain! Unfortunately, he started shaking after one minute a concerted effort of tilling this new stolen riparian land! You see all stolen lands are sweeter! Now this one was not even a mere stolen land. To him, it was a real riparian land. He remembered that there was one of his bodaboda rider who was a close friend to him. He had talked of something like withdrawal tactic! He decided to explore that narrative. He withdrew! Pretended that he was thirsty and he needed to cool his radiator. He added some water now to his cooling water jacket! He drunk some water to an extent of half a litre with only two sips thanks to his buggy and wide buccal cavity.

 

He came back again to till his mountainous task ahead of him! All this, was to buy some time. At least he could not be classified as one minute and fifty nine seconds man! It was his first trial anyway. He needed to have another encounter of climbing this big hill in front of his eyes. He started tilling it again. He continued and after three minutes of forced memory loss, he fired some hot liquids into this land’s heavenly entrance gates!

 

Shyness and shame filled the room. The two of them were in a state of don’t look at me now! Each one of them dressed quickly without facing one another. Doreen was the first one to leave the hotel room. She hurried and went to do some shopping as Mike was still wondering if he has really let that riparian land go! As he waited for her, he salvaged his thoughts. He wanted to make sure he is not ashamed in his future tilling this fertile riparian land endeavors!

 

A thought entered his mind. “What can I do to prolong myself?” He remembered his bodaboda colleagues boasting on how they usually take hours while tilling some stolen lands. They boasted on how they till those lands such that the whole of the land shakes and vibrates more than their chines beasts do! The bikes! “What do they take to have all that energy and to sustain such an elongated stay”? He wondered!

 

They must be real Kipchoges, they run these lands for more than one hour and fifty nine minutes that Kipchoge had run at Ineos campaign marathon in Vienna. Some said that they take cassava, when they know that they are going to till those special lands, they mix cassava and groundnuts. Others said that they took finger millet porridge or sorghum porridge. But he knew very well that these stuff could not really do such miracles.

 

He remembered that he had heard from a radio that morning that there is a man of cloak who was found with his man still standing even after he had kicked the bucket. He kicked the bucket while on top of a can of honey. He had taken some tablets to boost his tilling rate.

“I cannot take such a drug, after all I am young. What if I die on the process”? He thought! “But I have a new plan. I know what to do”. He concluded!

Doreen came back with her shopping and he rode her home. After three days, he called her again and this time now, gates of heaven had been opened and each of them had the keys! There was no more fear to ask anything or joke on anything as long as no one was around to decode what they could be saying via their mobile gadgets.

 

After all he would not let himself behave like half a man. He kept on telling her how it was a sweet day for him. The fear of being in a three star hotel is what made him to last for three minutes. Forget about the time he took while drinking some water! He continued and informed her that he was fatigued due to riding the bike continuously for those twenty five kilometers to the town and to make it worse, it was on a highway.

 

That that day he had not even taken anything like breakfast since there was a client who had called him at 5.00 am to be taken in the neighbouring division. That he had not yet returned home to have a breakfast or anything like taking a rest.

All these, he was saying to show that he was a gentleman when it comes into matters tilling these special lands. He even went ahead and informed her that in his home, even the bed shutters when he is weeding anything in his own land! All these were not near any truth! If there was anything like truth meter being applied to measure the clarity of his words, the gadget would have read in the negative direction!

 

Doreen was also eager to see that physique again! She  It was rough, hairy and muscles were seen everywhere. Not like Peter’s soft and smooth baby body.  She was also with a lot of money from the shop. She was never broke. She remembered that when she was in college, she used to hang around with Peter whenever he visited her at her university or she had gathered some coins to visit him. Due to lack of money and her naivety, she had not explored the city’s environment and its environs. But here she has a lot of money with her. Money that was in her responsibility.

 

She can travel from one town to another. To her, paying bus fare for Mike was not a big deal. As long as she would hold that physique in her arms. She started feeling jealous of his wife. “Damn it! How does she feel while holding such a beast in her arms”? She would imagine.

 

After five days of phone conversations, she had set her schedule when she could rush to the other town. Where no one would easily know her. She could even go ahead and look even for a five star hotel to enjoy herself.

Mike on his side decided to buy the drugs. The drugs that would make him run more than Kipchoge while tilling this stolen honeypot. A drug that would made him fit in the hour man and not the three minutes man in the song. However, he was cautious. What if he took it and he died? No he cannot accept to die. To avoid that, he decided that he will be taking only one tablet. Yes one tablet of Viagra. He could drive her mad with that one tablet! It could take him two hours before his blood running down in his arteries and ventricles would accept to come down.

He made sure that she never learnt that he was using a stimulating substance.

With time, she became addicted to him. He became addicted to her. He became addicted to the drug. She started developing some hatred towards Peter. Mike started developing kind of fatigue and at his home, he was always a tired man. Mike was feeling it difficulty to perform his duties at his home. His wife was mad. But he told her that he was maybe sick due to his nature of his work. The work of being a bodaboda rider was really difficult. He needed to look for a job that could not tire him and maybe he would be okay.

 

Peter, with some frustrations due to the kind of negative treatment that he was receiving from his wife, Doreen. He decided to see if he was the problem. He found Kageni. Kageni was a divorcee. She was divorced due to her promiscuity. Alas! She found someone that she could walk out with in the afternoon and have some services.

 

Doreen was too drunk with Mike such that when he left the town, after his wife asked her uncle to secure him a better job in Kisumu where he worked in a big company, she was unable to run the business because in order to substitute him, she tried all the boys she had employed to help her in the shop. Whenever she would taste and test anyone for three times, she could feel that no one would match Mike’s marathon long hours while tilling her. To her, they were all three seconds men! Not even three minutes men!

 

Fate struck! These boys discussed her deeds with each other. After they learnt that they have been scooping honey from the same pot, and after scooping for around three times they were all dumped and exchanged after one another. They decided to teach her a lesson! They started stealing cash and some stock after from the shop one after another.

 

The business fell within four months. That how Peter’s loans, savings, his parents help and his effort came into an abrupt ending.

 

The narrator of this story learnt it from John. The nursing officer.  He had enquired to know where Mike was. From his closest friend, JOHN.  This was after John had a colorful wedding but Mike missed in action.

John narrated to him where Mike was and what made him to leave the town. Mike works in an automobile workshop in Kisumu. His wife’s uncle secured him a job there.

It is from this perspective that John learnt from Mike what was going on and what made him leave.

“Hey man! I could not have hesitated from tilling that land bro! That what had made me to always take that one tablet of Viagra! Bro! hio kitu ilikuwa sawa bwana!” Mike said!

 

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